Friday, March 23, 2007

Lies, Lies, Lies!

I don't know who they are, but have you ever noticed that they seem to know a lot? Or, at least think they do? How many sentences do your husband or friends start with "Well, you know, they say . . . . . "

Well, I'm here to tell you, THEYare liars - the whole bunch of them. I have found several ways, just in the past week, and I will share with you.

1. "You will feel so much better when your house is really clean. You'll be able to relax, and just enjoy the atmosphere." Yeah, whatever. I sit in my clean (or, clean to me) house and think about the 7,000 other things I have to do and lament about the hours wasted cleaning. Truly, I've found I don't care if I didn't dust that week (okay month) - it doesn't change my atmosphere or relaxation one iota.

2. "Once you get into eating right, your body will feel so much better, you won't even miss those Cheetos and ho-hos, white bread, ice cream, etc. You will realize how your body feels when you eat them, and you won't even be hungry for them anymore!" PLEASE!! When I am hungry, I still have a debate in my head that could go head-to-head with any presidential debate in history, trying to convince myself that yogurt and All-Bran for breakfast will somehow taste just as good as a big ole bowl of Crunch Berries would've.

3. "The character building and lessons learned in sports far outweigh the winning and losing." Yes, the NCAA announcers are just going ga-ga over the best-built-character of the losers in the Sweet 16, and hardly talking at all about the winning free-throw. I agree there are many important lessons that can be learned at a sporting event - both for the participant and the observer - but don't tell me you're not there to win.

4. "You'll be all right, once you get your feet under you." And, I must admit, I've repeated this! But really - of course you'll be all right. You'll either be all right, insane, or smart enough to quit whatever had you floundering in the first place. Is this statement actually supposed to be helpful and supportive?

5. "God is in church, for sure, but don't be thinking He's at work, school, baseball, etc." There are lots of these out there, huh? Makes me mad and sad at the same time. We watched The Apprentice this weekend. Before the boardroom showdown, one gal was reading a Donald Trump biography - the other was reading the bible. The Trump gal said something to this effect - "if she thinks God is going to help her in that board room, she is sadly mistaken. It's Donald Trump that sits in the middle chair, and so far, I haven't seen God at his right side." Okay, let me tell you, my God sits at no one's right side - we are not even on equal footing! But, miraculously, He still shows up at my church, my school, my work, and anywhere else I would invite Him to be - what a wonderful TRUTH.


Neighbor Jane Payne said...

Great post Heather!

Kristi Brooke said...

Yea. I am so glad you signed up for Pink Christmas!